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Dealing With Road Rage
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familiar ways that angry drivers make their feelings known.
Congratulations! You are a rare person, because most people with this type of problem don't want to admit that they have a problem. Why? You guessed it! Most road ragers think that the problem is the other drivers, and they think their anger is a normal response--wrong. But you're smarter than that! You realize that no matter how bad other drivers might be, your anger and your actions are your responsibility. Get some help now, or read on!
Here are some thoughts for you to consider:
- Whatever happens on the road, it's not more important than your health or your freedom--both of which are in jeapordy if your road rage goes out of control for too long!
When you are extremely angry your higher brain functions shut down. Have you ever calmed down after a road rage incident and had the thoughts, "I can't believe I did that!" or, "I don't know what came over me--it seemed like something else was in charge of my actions." I had a client come to me after "waking up" to his road rage problem. He found himself pounding on a female driver's window after he had run her off the road--it was the look of stark terror on her face that snapped him out of it. Yes, people with extreme rage problems "black out" for periods of time, which is the evidence of higher brain function shutting down. The last place you want your higher brain function to shut down is behind the wheel. Learn more by reading about Intermittent Explosive Disorder.- The most dangerous place we can be as human beings is moving at high speeds down a crowded roadway in a large motor-powered chunk of metal. You simply cannot afford to add to that danger by letting your anger make your decisions for you. Anger is not smart! Just ask the people behind bars for aggression-related crimes.
- If you really want to beat this problem, you'll have to face the reality that the problem is not the other drivers. The problem is how you react to those other drivers, and that problem was there before you got in your car. Want to start fixing the problem right now? Try these anger management techniques, or call Dr. DeFoore (that's me) for a phone counseling session.
- You have anger management problems, or you wouldn't have road rage problems. To solve these problems, you will have to deal with your anger issues and learn about anger and rage addiction.
- Whether you have thought of it this way or not, you need to. Road rage is a very dangerous problem to have! When you release your anger behind the wheel and let it affect your driving, you are:
- Putting your own life at risk.
- Playing with the lives and safety of your passengers.
- Risking the lives of other drivers and their passengers.
- Risking your own freedom--yes, there are people in prison right now for road rage related incidents.
- Potentially hurting everyone who cares about you--because all of the above risks that threaten you will also threaten your loved ones in some way at some point.
- Keep your breathing slow and regular, expanding your belly with each breath. Relax your body as much as possible. This could help you prevent anger escalation that leads to full blown rage.
- Say comforting, reassuring things to yourself like, "Just relax. It's going to be OK. Just keep driving, and we'll get where we want to be." This kind of positive self-talk is very helpful--think of the statements that might work best for you and write them down.
- Turn on some soothing music. Music can actually help you change your emotions and thinking process. Classical music is particularly helpful for this.
- Wherever you are in a hurry to get to, think about how you will feel if you get a ticket, have a wreck or go to the hospital instead of arriving. Go ahead and slow down and risk being late.
- Remember that at some point you triggered somebody else's rage on the road! If you drive any amount at all, you're going to get in somebody's way, and they just might think you're one of those horrible drivers that drives them crazy. Ultimately, we're all in this together, and the sooner you realize that the sooner you will calm down and get where you're going.
- If you've really got courage, imagine sending love and joy to every motorist you see. Sounds hokey, but all we're trying to do here is get you and everybody else home safely--so, whatever works!
- Imagine that it is your loved ones that are in those other cars.
- Remember that every one of the motorists around you has a mother, father, children and may in fact be a good person that you might like!
- Know that deep inside, you're a good person and you don't want to hurt anybody. If you don't believe this as strongly as you would like to, you might want to get some anger management counseling.
Now for some things you can do right away to help you control your anger while driving:
Thanks for stopping by! Before you leave, check out these anger management books. Listen to free previews of these audio CD programs available for immediate download: Love, Anger and Forgiveness, Anger Management Techniques, and Healthy Anger and Your Health.
