Authored by William G. DeFoore, Ph.D.
Your best anger management resource is your good mind and your good heart. You (or someone you know) got disconnected from that great inner resource, and that's why the anger problems are showing up.
I'm Dr. William DeFoore, and I have over 40 years of experience as a professional counselor, author and speaker on anger management, healthy anger and healthy relationships. I believe in the unlimited capacity of each human being to overcome their problems and reach all of their goals.
Anger "hardens your heart," which is how you get disconnected from that center of compassion and wisdom at your core. And of course, this disconnects you from others...usually those you love the most.
When you're angry, you're usually blaming somebody else for how you feel. This is normal, but it just doesn't work. You can't get those other people to change (I hope you've figured that out by now...) so let's look at what you can do.
When you use the tools & resources we provide here, you're going to get smarter and stronger as you reconnect with your best inner nature. You'll learn to make your anger and all of your emotions work for you, not against you.
We want to help you to believe in yourself and your ability to get better.
You have a lot more freedom to change your situation and control your anger than you think you do. Take a look at what we offer here, and you'll see what I mean.
How is this approach to anger management going to make you smarter? It goes like this...unhealthy anger shuts down the smart part of your brain, and healthy anger gives you more access to your brain's power.
How will you get stronger when you learn to express your anger in healthy ways? Anger might seem strong, but when it causes you to act in ways you later regret, you're actually making yourself weaker with your anger.
Your best anger management resource is inside you...it is your good sense and good heart working together.
How do I know that you have a good heart? Because you're here, reading this. You wouldn't be on this site looking for help if you didn't want things to be better. I also know your heart is good because of my professional experience.
I've seen thousands of folks heal from their anger management issues, anxiety and depression. I watch them going deeper into who they really are, into their compassionate, loving heart and their basic good sense. This happens again and again, no matter how angry or upset the person was when they first started counseling.
I've heard that question many times...here's my best answer. Everyone has anger, but it's not always a problem. Anger management problems might show up if:
Those are a few of the main reasons, and there are more. You'll figure out the story behind your own anger as you use the journaling processes we recommend.
Once you know the story, you know the cause. When you know the cause, you can heal the pain and fear that's been driving your anger.
Time to jump in! Follow the links on this page, or do a search for the answers you need. No problem is too big for you to overcome. You can do this!