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Standing Up Will Make A Difference

by Rocky
(Ames, Iowa, USA)

When I was a little child, I experienced some painful memories of a bully who made me scared to ride the school bus. One day after school, I sat at the back of the school bus since there were open seats in the back.

Then this large kid came by and told me to get out of the seat. I told him that he could sit here too, since there was room for two people. He then got mad and said that he sat in the back by himself. Then he called me the n-word and then twisted my arm so hard that I began to scream and cry.

I was just a little kid and this kind of unnecessary violence was happening to me. The bus driver never heard my scream, and sometimes I felt that the driver just ignored all this. So I was scared to tell anyway on the bus, and all the other kids just sat there and did not stand or defend me. I felt so scared, but I felt that I had to tell someone about this incident.

When I got home, I told my mom about the incident and I was angry that someone had the nerve to do this to me. I did not want to keep quiet about this, because I felt humiliated that someone made me look like a victim and nobody did anything.

My mom called that kid’s mother and told her about what her son did to me, and my mom told her that if she did not do anything that she was going to report this to the school and go further if this ever happened again. My mother was determined not to let a bully run my life and plus there was some racism involved.

My mom showed them that this was not okay and if they continued we would not allow this to happen. I think that anyone who is a victim of a bully should stand up by letting an adult know about this situation. I believe that a victim should never conceal this, because they are not at fault and should try to stop this in the future by making it clear that they will not allow this to continue.

By standing up to a bully, you are saying that there will be consequences if this unnecessary behavior continues.

Response from Dr. DeFoore

Good story, Rocky. Thanks for your contribution. I think this will help people who read it. Standing up for what we believe and against what we think is wrong is very important as you point out. And sometimes it can help to prevent further violence for others.

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Feb 05, 2009
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Strategic Conference
by: Anonymous

I agree that the bully needs to be confronted, but be careful how the action is performed. Some bullies respond to logic and reason. Some are desperate for attention and can be won over with compliments.

Other bullies require a "sit-down" with parents moderating to some degree. Of course, you must keep in mind that some kids are mentally unstable and no level of negotiation works. My best friend's kid had to learn karate to defend himself. Now, the bully gets beaten up every time he starts something with him, but it almost seems like the bully just likes to fight, win or lose. Fortunately, "the Karate Kid" can take care of himself now.

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