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It Needed To End But Now I Feel Devastated

by Anonymous

Walking Away Was The Right Thing

Walking Away Was The Right Thing



I've been in a 3 year relationship with a guy who I thought to be the man of my dreams. His only problem was that he had no control over his anger whatsoever.

He snaps at pretty much anything and says the most insulting things ever, then when I confront him later, he usually insists that he's not mistaken and won't apologize. Then he apologizes, promises to change, and days later it happens all over again.

For the first 2 years I used to try to absorb it, contain it. Until I couldn't take the insults or the screaming anymore. You can imagine, our life became full of constant fights. He lashes out at me, shouts, insults over the simplest things then again give me promises.

Until the last fight yesterday, he told me he won't apologize for lashing out and won't change and he asked me to make a choice whether I want to live with him the way he is or we can breakup.


I tried to talk him out of it, to ask him to keep trying and that I would support him, he refused. He said that's how he'll always be, take it or leave it.

So I told him that I can't live this way. And that was it. He said goodbye and left me. I feel devastated and I just keep blaming myself and I don't even know why.

Please help. Is there a way to get him back minus his anger?

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May 29, 2016
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You Did The Right Thing And Now It's Time To Let Go
by: Dr. DeFoore

Hello, and thanks for your story. To answer your question, he's already answered it for you. You want him without the anger, but he doesn't want to give it up.

It's over, and it's important that you accept that, in case he tries to get back together. It's time to you to focus on your self esteem and letting go of this abusive relationship.

Learn about the letting go of a relationship, and begin the process of learning to love yourself to only be in relationships where you are respected at all times.

You can do this. You are worthy of respect and consistent kindness.

My very best to you,

Dr. DeFoore

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