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I'm A Good Woman But An Angry Mom

by Anonymous

I had a troubled childhood with a very abusive father who abused me, my sister, and my mom emotionally, verbally, and physically. I was a very angry person as a child - but my anger was almost always focused on my family.

I rarely got into visible altercations with outsiders. I always knew that deep inside I am a very loving and empathetic person. So, I tried very hard to control my anger towards my family, but to no avail.

When I got married and had children, I changed the focus of my anger to my new family. In the beginning, I was unstoppable in my rage. It used to happen much more frequently and last much longer. I still did not get angry at anyone else but my own family.

Eventually I could reach a point that my rage against my husband was significantly reduced. It happened very rarely if ever. But my anger at my children continues. I keep getting snappy at them every few days and sometimes I even lash out and smack them.

They are so scared of me when I do that. The other day I verbally lashed out at my daughter so bad that I reminded myself of my dad.

I hate myself for hurting my poor babies. I do not want to scream and shout at them. I know that rage never serves any purpose - I am a living example of that. And yet, I keep repeating the same pattern. I think about it so much and promise myself that I will never scream or hit them again.

But, when they do something really annoying or if I am tired, sleepy, stressed, busy or anything but in complete control of my senses, I lash out very violently at them. We are such a loving family and my kids love me so very much. I am afraid I will lose their love and respect forever if I keep up what I am doing!

I am hurting the very people I love most and swore to protect. Please help me!

- Desperate mother

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Jul 30, 2017
You Made The Right Choice To Ask For Help
by: Dr. DeFoore

Hello, and thanks for telling your story here. I believe you when you say you want to do better, and that you don't want to hurt your children.

Please read and follow all of the guidance you find in this article. Do the exercises diligently and consistently, and you will start to feel some results, and greater control over your anger.

I'm glad you seem to feel a sense of urgency about your situation. It is urgent...please take these recommended actions immediately, and then do the exercises daily for at least 90 days, then as needed after that.

I believe you can and will do this. I believe that, as you say in your title, you are a good woman.

My very best to you,

Dr. DeFoore

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