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Whenever I get angry, it becomes an all out war on my end to not do anything to rash or stupid. When I do become angry, which has become quite frequent, I picture killing the person that made me angry.
My imagination has become quite vivid and disturbing. When I sleep angry, my dreams are about killing and torture and the images I see in both my dreams and thoughts are extremely disturbing.
What can I do to possibly control this anger issue of mine?
Response from Dr. DeFoore
Thank you for asking for help on this site. The reason you don't like these thoughts and feelings you're having is that they don't match up with who you are or how you want to be. You don't like these thoughts, dreams or images because you're a good person who really wants to do the right thing. And you came to the right place.
There are good reasons for the violent thoughts and feelings you're having--you just need to find out what those reasons are. You have to get back to the source of your rage and anger.
I strongly encourage you to write the "story" of your anger. Trace it back to where it started, and write about all of the trauma and pain that caused it in the first place. Write about every situation in which you feel that you've been badly treated, especially going back to the earliest ones. This is a good first step.
You'll find a complete step by step process for the writing and imagery healing process on this FAQ page.
After writing about these difficult memories, it's a good idea to write about what is good, right and working in your life. Write about what you're grateful for, what you appreciate, and what you are looking forward to in your future. This activates a positive, healthy part of your brain.
There are some pages on this site that will offer lots of help for you, dealing with anger addiction, for example. Just do a search using the term "anger addiction" in the search window at the top of this page, and you'll find the pages to help you.
The most important thing is that you don't give up on yourself. If you make up your mind to solve these problems, you can do it. Others have, and you can too.
The reason I suggested the pages above is that the kind of thoughts you are having usually come from past trauma. That's why I said they are there for a reason. When you use the methods you will find on the above referenced pages, and our other anger management techniques on this site, you will start to feel some relief.
Believe in yourself, and the good person you are inside.
My very best to you,
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