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The Story Of My Pain

by Lisa
(Chennai, India)

Sir, it gives me immense pleasure to be in touch with you again. I get your newsletters which are of great help to me during problems. I would like to trouble you again with my conflict and I earnestly need counseling from you as I have received before.

Nowadays I'm feeling very depressed ,irritated and frustrated about my life. My life is a monotonous one with work, household responsibilities and my son. Me and my husband have no time for each other because of the different work timings. so in case we see each other I start shouting and pouring all my frustration on him, hence there is only fighting between us. I've started feeling jealous looking at people going out together, enjoying etc.

I feel frustrated about my sick life. I'm not living a life with peace or any kind of stability I feel. I feel wrecked. Please help me. The past memories haunt me. As soon as I got married life was tough. My husband went abroad when I just conceived. Throughout my pregnancy he was not with me.

He saw my son when he was six months old. My husband had to come back as he lost his job during gulf war. We were in debts. Life was always tough but now thing have changed. Yet, I'm still not out of the trauma. I always feel I'm unlucky and feel inferior compared to my sister and cousins since they are doing good.

I feel irritated always and have no interest in life. My past comes always in my thoughts. I feel down always and feel very jealous of people who are doing good and happy.

I don't know what to do. Day by day it's getting worse. Please help me.

Response from Dr. DeFoore

Hello Lisa, and thanks for writing again. From what you have said, it seems the best way I can help you is to suggest some activities.

I want you to do the journaling processes you will find on this page. There are three journaling processes on that page, and I encourage you to do all of them. This will help you with the memories that are haunting you, and it will also give you some emotional control.

Only you can bring order to your life. No one else can do that for you. Keep your house well, take care of your health, get regular exercise, and develop a strong spiritual practice. These are basic practices that provide a foundation for a stable life.

You need to learn to love yourself, Lisa. Take a look at this page on self love, and see if that helps you.

As you practice the positive journaling processes, focus on the good in you, your husband, and your world. This will really help you.

My very best to you,

Dr. DeFoore

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