Now Available! Dr. DeFoore's New Book GOODFINDING
Authored by William G. DeFoore, Ph.D.
Many people think teen violence is all about bad teens. It's not. Whether it's school violence, bullying or family problems violent teens are sending a message, and we need to hear it.
As the caring adults in the violent teen's life, we are responsible for how we prevent and respond to violent behavior of any kind.
These kids are not bad to the core, but they may indeed be very dangerous. We have to deal with all of that.
It's important that you believe that you are bigger than the problem of teen violence.
Your love, your positive focus of attention, and your sincere desire to help are a far more powerful combination than you may have ever known.
Violent teens have a message. Let's see if we can figure out what it is.
Here are some possibilities:
Keep in mind these are only possibilities. Teen violence is a complex problem, and violent teens may be trying to send other types of messages as well, such as:
Teen violence often comes from kids who feel like victims--or who have in fact been victims.
One way of understanding the psychology of violence is that the perpetrator is trying to create a victim in the outside world as a way of dealing with the victim inside. It's as if they were trying to get the pain inside out by putting it in another person. I've actually heard some perpetrators say, "I just wanted them to hurt the way I was hurting."
While on the surface this just seems disturbing, it also offers a possible solution to problems like teen violence. If we can somehow address, understand and help to heal the pain in the troubled teens, we may be able to prevent them from becoming violent.
Sure, you do want to "get the message" being sent by the violent teens in your life, but you also have to insure safety for yourself and others. Here are some thoughts to consider:
The point here is that healthy authority is an important aspect of love in parenting teenagers, and sometimes it solves the problem of teen violence immediately.
Many teens have calmed down and begun behaving well overnight, when the adults in their lives claim loving, powerful, healthy authority that makes sense.
In addition to what we said above about claiming authority, let's focus on responding to some of the "messages" the violent teen might be sending.
Here are some things you can do to prevent or solve the problem of teen violence:
Below, you will find a wonderful audio CD/download program that will help you in dealing with and preventing teen violence. Try it now with our no-risk full money-back guarantee!
ANGER IN TEENS:
Understanding and Helping Adolescents with Anger Management
Learn how you can become more skilled and helpful in dealing with the angry teens in your life. This 2-CDprogram will inform and empower you to become a positive leader in your relationships with adolescents, guiding them toward a healthy, happy future.
The knowledge and techniques provided here are highly valuable and practical in helping you to know what to do and when to do it. You can become one of the greatest assets in your teen's life!
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