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My Anger Is Out Of Control And I Don't Know Where It Comes From
I'm normally not an angry person. I think I have great heart and respect other people's views and feelings 99% of the time. It's when something triggers me in a certain way, like someone not doing what I want or expect them to do, I just seem to lose control of myself and can't figure out where it comes from from.
An example is my girlfriend. Me and her son were visiting lake gaston on her son's birthday weekend. We were down by the lake shooting BB guns. He's only 11 yrs. old. He starting shooting the gun somewhat erratically and I told him to stop. When he didn't I lost my temper and grabbed him around his neck and said what the hell is wrong with you.
I just lost it and I know that's not my normal behavior. When I lose my temper I seem to lose control of myself and don't where it comes from. I start shaking and act like a damn fool and it takes me a while to calm. I know this is very unhealthy for me and especially the people I love. I don't know where this comes from. That's why I'm asking what am I suppose to do when I feel this way? Thanks.
Response from Dr. DeFoore
Hello, and thanks for telling your story here. I can tell you're a good person, who really wants to heal his anger problem. I will try to help.
By the time you're in the anger outburst, it's too late to fix it...at that point you just want to get away from others until you calm down, so that you do no harm. I recommend that you use the tools you will find on this FAQ page. This will help you to understand and heal your anger, so that when it comes out its not so toxic.
Be sure and do all of the steps in that link. These are powerful tools, but they only work if you use them. And the more you use them the better they work for you.
Believe in yourself and the goodness in your heart.
My very best to you,
P.S. If you found this to be helpful, please consider making a donation to this site to support our mission to help you become your own best anger management resource.
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