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I have been with my boyfriend for over 3 years now. We have broken up a few times when he suddenly decides he doesn't want me anymore but then regrets it a few weeks later. Then I go back to him only for him to tell me that I'm not what he wants and that I need to change for him.
He will yell and scream at me if he does something wrong, and I get upset because to him he can do no wrong therefore I can never get mad. He tells me he doesn't want me and lies to me on a daily basis, and on the same day tells me he can't wait to marry me. This has emotionally drained me.
I use to be really depressed but have built myself up from that time. But right now I feel myself slipping into depression again. And when I try to open up and talk about it with him he ignores me. If I get upset and let a tear fall he yells at me again and tells me I need to grow up.
I have tried leaving him, but he treats me so great and loving that I go back to him only for it to last for a week and he's right back to how he is. But this isn't the man I fell in love with and I'm still holding on to the hope that he will go back to the amazing person he used to be.
The worst part is I am most likely pregnant (I still have to wait the 6 days till my missed period to take the test) so I'm not sure. But when I tell him I might be pregnant he says nothing and ignores me. When I tell him I'm nervous he tells me "alright." He doesn't comfort me at all and I need that right now.
I guess I'm writing this because I don't have any friends to talk to about this because they all don't support me being with him anyways, so their advice would be to just leave him. I don't feel comfortable talking to my family about this either.
I don't want to leave him, I love him so much plus we might be having a baby. But I know I can't keep living like this. What do I do? Thank you!
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