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He Lies To Me And Says He Wants To Marry Me

by Anonymous

I have been with my boyfriend for over 3 years now. We have broken up a few times when he suddenly decides he doesn't want me anymore but then regrets it a few weeks later. Then I go back to him only for him to tell me that I'm not what he wants and that I need to change for him.

He will yell and scream at me if he does something wrong, and I get upset because to him he can do no wrong therefore I can never get mad. He tells me he doesn't want me and lies to me on a daily basis, and on the same day tells me he can't wait to marry me. This has emotionally drained me.

I use to be really depressed but have built myself up from that time. But right now I feel myself slipping into depression again. And when I try to open up and talk about it with him he ignores me. If I get upset and let a tear fall he yells at me again and tells me I need to grow up.
I have tried leaving him, but he treats me so great and loving that I go back to him only for it to last for a week and he's right back to how he is. But this isn't the man I fell in love with and I'm still holding on to the hope that he will go back to the amazing person he used to be.

The worst part is I am most likely pregnant (I still have to wait the 6 days till my missed period to take the test) so I'm not sure. But when I tell him I might be pregnant he says nothing and ignores me. When I tell him I'm nervous he tells me "alright." He doesn't comfort me at all and I need that right now.

I guess I'm writing this because I don't have any friends to talk to about this because they all don't support me being with him anyways, so their advice would be to just leave him. I don't feel comfortable talking to my family about this either.

I don't want to leave him, I love him so much plus we might be having a baby. But I know I can't keep living like this. What do I do? Thank you!

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Aug 04, 2015
Your Friends See More Clearly Than You Do
by: Dr. DeFoore

Hello, and thanks for telling your story here. It would be a very bad decision for you to marry this man. You cannot have love without trust and respect, and his lies and verbal abuse toward you destroy trust and respect.

You must decide to take care of yourself, especially if you're pregnant. Please do not bring a child into this abusive relationship. You are all you've got. And you're all your child will have.

Make the right decision. If you don't have the strength to end the relationship, contact your local family services department for support.

I think you will do the right thing.

My best to you,

Dr. DeFoore

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