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On April 2, 2002, my mom passed away. She was my mom, my sister and my best friend.
My parents split up soon after I was conceived, and I never met my father. She later married a man who treated me like his own. I didn't know it was an act.
He never abused me in any way. I don't think he ever hit my mom, but he cheated on her like a randy goat! I only got to know about this when she was gone, by going through her diary. Then I realized the whole "happy family" was a lie.
My mom's cause of death was listed as TB, Meningitis and immunosuppression. I guess it was a polite way of saying AIDS. What still hurts is she left when I really needed her. I was turning 18, the time all girls need moms to guide them.
I blame my stepfather for infecting her with HIV. He is still alive. I wish God would answer my question why.
I want to ask my mom why she didn't leave before it was too late? I am an only child and I didn't want to hurt my elderly grandmother by grieving too much. I tried to be strong for her.
I ask God why he would take my mom, a devout Christian who was always kind and willing to help, to forgive? I am now married with two handsome boys. I am easily angered and can emotionally shut off.
A part of me died with my mom, I honestly don't know if it will come back.
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