July 15, 2021
Healing Anger Newsletter, Issue #158
Archive issue from March,2018
Contents Of This Newsletter
Why Do You Have Regrets?
In a nutshell...it's because you're a good person. You want to be good, and get better, so when you look back and recall something you did that was hurtful to you or someone else, you wish it had been different.
This is a totally normal human feeling. Everyone has regrets, but few people really learn, grow and benefit from them. That's what you're about to learn how to do.
Here are some of the most common regrets:
- The biggest one is when you've hurt someone you love. And the worst part of this is if you don't change your behavior, and you keep doing it, you'll fall into shame, guilt and self-hatred, which can cause tremendous anger and abusiveness.
- Another common regret is missed opportunities, especially those that seem like they'll never come along again.
- Perhaps the deepest and most subconscious regret is realizing you are not measuring up to the goodness that you know you're capable of.
- Unexpressed creativity can bring on a deep and powerful sense of regret. You are naturally creative, and it actually creates a strong sense of regret if you do not express your creative potential.
- Unexpressed love can bring up tremendous feelings of regret. You were born to give and receive love...that's who you are and how you're made,
so when you don't express it, you will naturally feel regret.
I just published an entire article on how to make regrets work for you and not against you. Check it out here.
"Regret is an internal reminder of who you really are and who you want to be in your relationships with others."
Many people fall into a pit of regret, and can never find their way out. Don't let that happen to you. You have choices, and that's what we're exploring together here.
As you will see in the list below, there are some very positive ways to respond to regret, where it actually helps you to improve and become more like the good person you were born to be.
Keep your positive connections working for you by discovering all of the ways to participate in the Goodfinding Community Online page.
How To Make Regret Work For You
Since your mind is going to naturally do the regret thing, why not figure out how to benefit from it?
Regret is just that old "20-20 hindsight," which is your mind trying to help you learn from your experience and improve yourself.
Here are some steps to take:
- Make a list of any and all regrets, as a type of journaling
- Take a look at each one, and write about the ways that you have already improved because of these experiences. This should be a feel-good thing!
- Next look at the regrets that bother you the most, and set your mind to the changes you want to make so that you're learning and growing from that experience as much as you possibly can. This is where you get smarter and stronger as you benefit from your regrets.
- Get very clear about the emerging vision of the person you choose to become, as a result of your experience and growth.
Make this an ongoing practice, so that you do not have to go through life dragging a heavy load of regrets...it just doesn't have to be that
It's never too late. I know a 98 year old man who is still reflecting on his life experiences and making improvements based on what he has learned. I bet you're younger than 98!
This highly effective audio program, available as a CD or MP3 download, will help you turn all of your past experiences into positive opportunities for growth and learning.
Take advantage of the free previews when you click on the image above, and the no-risk return policy that guarantees your
Welcome To New Subscribers
The Healing Anger Newsletter brings you a refreshing, helpful and upbeat approach to anger management and how it can work for you in every aspect of your life. Here is your chance to keep up with my (Dr. DeFoore here) latest discoveries and insights on anger management and how you can heal the anger in yourself, your family, your school and your workplace.
If you like this ezine, please do a friend and me a big favor and "pay it forward" by forwarding it to them. If a friend did forward this to you and if you like what you read, please subscribe by visiting the Healing Anger Newsletter subscription page.
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What's New On The Web Site? New web pages for you
. I just published a new web page called, Regret Quotes
that will walk you through the steps of how to make your regrets into opportunities. Read new contributions from good folks like you, such as My Sister Is Having A Really Hard Time
by a bright 14 year old girl concerned about her 10 year old sister, and Fear For The Future
by another adolescent girl, 17 years old, who is having trouble dealing with her brother's anger. Check Out Our Facebook Page!
It gives you all of the latest updates from Dr. DeFoore and visitors like you. To follow us on Facebook, just go to Anger Management Resource by Dr. William DeFoore
and click on "Like" at the top of the page -- or, follow us on Twitter
! Our Other Web Site!
That's right, Dr. DeFoore (that's me) has created another web site that is all about helping you feel good about yourself and the world around you. Visit goodfinding.com
and find lots of positive, upbeat perspectives to help you with your anger and every aspect of your life, and sign up for the Goodfinding Newsletter
, and/or the Daily Goodfinding Quotes
P.S. Why not make the rest of your life the best of your life? You can get started right now with Elegant Aging: Growing Deeper, Stronger and Wiser.
P.P.S. Did you know that I offer telephone (including Skype and Face Time video phone) counseling around the world? That's right, from the comfort of your home, you can get professional counseling from me, Dr. William DeFoore. Contact us now to schedule a session!
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