Untamed Anger

by Anonymous

I don't know where to start. I know that I get angry at times for things I shouldn't. I also make the people around me uncomfortable when I raise my voice.

My ex boyfriend said he felt I constantly verbally abused him in our relationship. I wouldn't say constantly, but now that I think about it, those times should have never happened.

Every time I think I have control of my feelings and anger I blow up again. I know this is a major issue and if I want a chance of getting back together, I need to work on some issues first.

I have called him names and he never would do the same back. I feel so bad now!

Response from Dr. DeFoore

Hello, and thanks for telling your story here. It is great that you want to work on your issues before resuming your relationship. You sound like a good and bright person, and it is certainly clear that you have an anger problem.

The reason you feel so bad is that you know you're better than how you've been acting. The intense anger that has been erupting from you is there for a reason, and you need to find out what it is. When you do that, and "tell the story" behind your anger, it will begin to subside.

That's just the beginning however. You will find the step by step process you need to follow described on this FAQ page. Be sure and do each exercise thoroughly, and be consistent--that way you will get the best possible results.

If this does not give you the results you want, you may need to seek professional counseling and/or take one of these online anger management classes.

I also suggest you read the following pages:

anger management techniques
quotes on relationships
relationship advice

Believe in yourself and the goodness in your heart. That is where your healing will come from.

My very best to you,

Dr. DeFoore

P.S. If you found this to be helpful, please consider making a donation to this site to support our mission to help you become your own best anger management resource.

P.P.S. If you got something of value here, we would also greatly appreciate it if you would provide a written testimonial about the site, Dr. DeFoore's help, or one of our products.