Similar To Rachel's Dilemma

by Anonymous

Hi. I understand somewhat of what Rachel is going through. My parents and me are going through the same thing, except in a less severe form of abuse. My older brother has control over what stations to watch on TV, and over the doors being closed when he comes out of his room.

We have to be out of the kitchen when he is making something to eat, and most of the time he would get my mother to do the chores for him. We're getting tired of it. Just wondering what we should do. We think he is on drugs or something. Please let me know. Thanks.

Response from Dr. DeFoore

Hello, and thanks for telling your story here. It sounds like it's time for some tough love in your house. Your brother has been given all of the power he has, and it is not his fault or yours. Your parents gave him that power, and now it won't be easy to take it back.

Suggest to your parents that they take a look at this page on parenting teenagers and this one on teen violence.

You will also find some help in these quotes on relationships and abusive relationships.

The bottom line is you and your mom have to take charge of your home. Your mom has given too much power to your brother, and he's abusing it.

Also, believe the best of your brother. He's not a bad person. Expect him to respond in a good way to the action you and your mother take.

My very best to you,

Dr. DeFoore

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