Parenting Adult Children
Who Just Won't Act Right





Parenting adult children is a problem in itself. If they're adults, they're not supposed to need parenting. But if they're in your home and causing problems, you certainly want to know what to do to make things better and not worse.

Something's wrong here, or this young adult son or daughter would not still be in your home, or just causing problems in your life. parenting adult children

You love them and want the best for them, but it seems like everything you do backfires. That's because you're not the one that needs to be helping them.

Learn from the experiences of other good parents, in the great stories on this page.



Get Some Help With Parenting Adult Children


Here is your chance to read the stories of other parents dealing with this problem, and see what their recommendations are.

And you can tell your own story or ask your question, and get some Dr. DeFoore's professional recommendations. Just fill out the form below, and if your submission is selected, it will be published as a web page, along with the recommendations.

Be sure and include the following in your submission:

  • A full description of your situation, and the problems you're having with parenting your adult sons and daughters

  • Any background information that you feel is relevant

  • Any specific questions you have for Dr. DeFoore

That's all we need from you. The rest is the story you tell about the adult children in your life.

Want to get right to the solution? Read this book!


Learn more about parenting adult children and how to break free from the many problems associated with this issue.



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Have A Great Story Or Question
About Your Adult Son Or Daughter?



Whether it's shocking, funny or infuriating, we'd like to hear your stories and questions about your adult children.

You have questions or stories to tell, or you wouldn't be on this site. If you'd like some help, you can get help here. You may feel helped just by writing!

Also, other visitors might be able to help with their comments, stories and questions. Sometimes I (Dr. DeFoore here) offer comments, and I try to answer most of the questions.

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Other Visitors' Stories And Questions

Click below to see contributions from other visitors to this page...

My 35 Year Old Physical Trainer Son Physically Abuses Me 
My 35 year old son is a physical trainer, weighs about 230 lbs, and is 6'2" tall. He recently grabbed hold of me with all his strength and aggressively …

My 20 Year Old Son Has A Son He Does Not See 
I am a single mother of a 20 year old son who has been abusing me since he was 14. It was very difficult when he was 14 through 16. He abused me verbally …

Not Sure What To Do - 19 Year Old Son Vs Single Mom 
I've always been a single parent. I have one son who is 19, and his dad lives in another country. They've never met. I have white knuckled the last …

Adult Brother Showing Signs of Emotional Abuse Toward Elderly Mother 
Dear Dr. DeFoore: My adult brother, 51 years old, lives with my elderly mother in her home. My Mother is mentally alert and physically active as she …

My 45 Year Old Daughter Is Depressed And Angry 
My adult daughter is an excellent RN, and has been highly regarding by her co-workers and the physicians she has worked with. She is now 45 years old. …

My 20 Year Old Son Is Abusive And I'm Very Worried About Him 
My 20 year old son is an only child. His father and I split up when he was about 3. This after physically abusing me in front of my son one time. …

Help For My Adult Daughter's Anger 
My daughter is married to her high school sweetheart, and they have been together for over 18 years in total. They grew up in the same town, and went …

I Can't Take The Stress Of Dealing With My 18 Year Old Son 
I am a Single, 42 yr old woman with only one child, my son. He is 18 yrs old and he is causing me to be very depressed and ready to give up. He is hurting …

My 20 Year Old College Student Son Is Disrespectful To Me And Drinking Alcohol 
My 20 year old son went off to college and joined a frat. He has always had some anger issues but now they are getting worse. He cusses me and this …

How Do You Turn Away Or Just Say No To Your Children When They Are Grown Adults? 
Hello. My story pertains to a son who is 19 years old, was attending school doing just great then met a girl and has gone down hill since. Within the …

Adult Son Who Has Custody Of His Daughter And Lives With Me 
My 20 year old son, who lives with me and is dependent upon me has anger issues that range from disrespect, feeling every comment is a personal attack …

How Can I Help My Angry 23 Year Old Son? 
I have a son that is 23 & he is also a Heroin addict. He was homeless for a awhile before I decided to take him back into my home so he would be safe …

Adult Child Who Needs Coping Skills And Anger Control 
Dear Doctor, I have a 25 year old son who can be very caring. He is a hard worker who makes a good income and is a very responsible person especially …

Adult Son In Our Home Smoking Pot And Being Irresponsible 
I have been living with my boyfriend and his 23 year old son for the past year and a half and we have plans on getting married. My boyfriend has been divorced …

My 30 Year Old Son Lashes Out In Anger 
My son was living on his own since he was 18. Had a girlfriend for a few years with an engagement but it did not work out. I know they yelled a lot when …

I Don't Know What To Do About My Adult Son Who Won't Move Out 
I am a 46 year old married mum of four. Three sons, 9, 11 and 24 and a daughter, 21. Our girl does not live at home but the boys do. I am at my wits …

Adult Son Is Verbally Abusive 
I have a 31 year old son who is married with a 3 month old baby. He was always a difficult child who had many temper tantrums as a child with anger …

Adult Child With Anger And Other Emotional Issues 
Hello. I am the middle child in a family of three children, the eldest daughter, Deb, being 34 years old. Deb is a very intelligent person: She holds …

29 Year Old Adult Son With Extreme Anger Issues  
My son has always had problems with self control and anger management. As his mom I suspected he was ADHD from a very young age-2 years. I would bring …

My 20 Year Old Son Is Very Disrespectful 
My son is 20 years old. He left a prestigious college in his 5th semester and came home. He gets angry easily, breaks things and tears his clothes, …

Need Help With My 20 Year Old Son 
Please help. My 20-year-old son has such uncontrollable rage at times, that it is very worrisome to me. He was diagnosed with Bipolar Disorder at about …

My Son Is Abusive To Me Even Though I Support Him Financially 
I feel like I have been verbally and emotionally abused by my son since he was teen. Now he is 28 but I still tip toe around him to not get him angry. …

Dearly Loved Son Whose Emotions Made Him Mentally Ill Not rated yet
I have just reached a break point in my relationship with my 35 yr old son. For the first time he has hit me, his mother, not just once but repeatedly. …

Angry 20 Year Old Son Abusive To His Father Not rated yet
We have a 20 year old son who can be very verbally abusive to all of us but especially to his father. His father is European and thinks the world of …

Click here to write your own.

Stressed Out Mom Who Can't Decide Not rated yet
I'm a single Mom of two adult children. I raised them for the most part, but their father was involved in their lives while they were growing up. …

At My Wits End With My 30 Year Old Daughter Not rated yet
My 30 year old college graduate daughter lives with me - pays no rent, and has a part time waitress job. I am retired and separated from my husband. …

Trying to Understand My Son's Angry Outbursts Not rated yet
My older son is almost 54. He has been married for 23 years, has two sons ages 21 and 16, and a daughter 19. My older grandson has a learning disability …

My 20 Year Old Son Is Abusing Me And His Sister Not rated yet
My son is 20. He's my older.child and my daughter/his full sister is 17. He is at best disrespectful; at worst violent. My husband (his dad) lives …

My 20 Year Old Son Acts Like A 15 Year Old Not rated yet
I have a 20 yr old son who is learning disabled. He has processing deficits and was in Special Education throughout school. He also seems to have some …

My Abusive Adult Handicapped Son Not rated yet
The very first day that I let him talk me into letting him live with me was about ten years ago. I am a 61 year old male. He took my car keys and …

Everybody Gets What They Deserve And I Can't Change That Not rated yet
My son's in jail, and still won't write his goals down! My son is a charmer who uses brinkmanship to get his way. He obviously has adult hyperactivity …

Adult Son Is Verbally Abusive And Hurtful Not rated yet
I have an adult son who is always abusing me. I raised my three children by myself with no financial assistance from their father. We separated when …

I'm Confused By My Adult Son's Anger Not rated yet
I have a 40-year old son who has increasing episodes of angry outbursts that he says I am triggering, but I can't see what I'm doing or saying that sets …

Adult Kids Mean To Mom Not rated yet
I have a daughter 32 and a son 26. Their dad and I are divorced 11yrs. I am learning that my kids have been playing between their parents all of these …

20 Year Old Son Giving Orders About Me Not Seeing His Ex Girlfriend Not rated yet
Thank You for giving me a platform to vent. I have a 20 year old son with a recent girlfriend whom we don't welcome in our home anymore. That story will …

I Am At The End Of The Rope With My 21 Year Old Daughter Not rated yet
My daughter is now 21 years old. She was a brilliant child, top of her Class, best scouts for 2 years in a row, champion of Lebanon in Kung-Fu in her category …

My Adult Son The Verbal Abuser And The Basher Not rated yet
My son is now 29 years old. He is handsome, charming, and almost everyone adores him. They would think, in my telling the following, that I am completely …

My 20 Year Old Is Angry All The Time And Used To Do Drugs Not rated yet
My son is 20 years old. When he was 14, he moved in with his dad and got into some drugs. He was diagnosed with ADHD when he was about 6. He always …

Grown Abusive Son Needs To Leave Not rated yet
My wife and I live in Georgia. I have a 38 year old adult step son (my wife's) who has done drugs since he was about 15 and for years, pretty much lived …

Older 42 Year Old Son Appears To Be Out Of Control Not rated yet
Our son is 42 and becomes threatening, abusive and out of control at the slightest provocation. He directs his venom towards his mother, sister and girlfriend, …

Living With An Adult Abusive Son Not rated yet
I have an almost 21 year old, who is always angry. Most days he is very verbally abusive to both myself and also his twin sister. He does not want …

Angry Son With Angry Partner Not rated yet
OK. My son is a high achiever. Very. Works in films, aged 27. He veers from being loving, highly intelligent, incredibly entertaining and funny, and …

My 29 Year Old Problem Son Still Lives With Me Not rated yet
I have a 29 year old son who is my only child. I started having real problems when he was 15 or 16. He has lived with me all his life. He was on his own …

My 20 Year Old Nephew Is In Trouble And Needs Help Not rated yet
My sister's youngest son has violent, vulgar anger issues. When PJ was in school he was diagnosed with anger management problems and while in school was …

Depressed And Angry Nineteen Year Old Son Not rated yet
My nineteen year old son is very depressed and at times he gets very angry that I'm too frightened to talk to him. I get worried that one day he might …

Anger In Denial Not rated yet
I have a grown son of 23 who is now married and has a baby who's just turned a year in April. He and his partner had only 'dated' for 3 months before she …

Looking For Help For My Son Not rated yet
Dear Dr. DeFoore, I stayed in a volatile, violent relationship with my first love who I was trying to help with his drug problem to the detriment of …

32 Year Old Son Is Out Of Control Not rated yet
My 32 year old son is currently living with his grandmother, uncle, and aunt in grandma's house. He works in construction, but he's unemployed and currently …

Click here to write your own.



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