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Submitted by: Abby

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From what you describe of going blank, snapping out of it, getting very angry and so on you may have a chemical/hormonal imbalance and you need to have that properly checked out. You are worried about yourself and you are right to be worried in so much as, you do not want to bring others or yourself any harm. Ring up your local health service/department (there should be something in the front of your phone book about what is available) and find out where you can go to be supported and get some help. You can do this anonymously and see what is available. I, and others on this site, have been through terrible abuse too and know how difficult it can be. However, turning into what has hurt you and therefore hurting others and yourself again is not the answer. You don't want to be responsible for creating the same damage in someone else who is innocent do you? Please continue to write and dialogue with us here. It feels like a little community and you will find comfort and support. Personally though I will encourage you to do EVERYTHING possible to help yourself and it's very important that you have a medical check up and tell the doctor what is happening with your anger. Don't be afraid, you have to get help and you will find support on this site while you are doing it.

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