I Can't Admit I'm Wrong

by Janet
(England)

I get angry about my partner because he wastes money and doesn't listen to me. I sometimes get violent with him.

I tend to say the most awful words to him and cannot admit to being wrong. I always want to be right. I tend to find we cannot agree to anything.

And I always feel depressed and also cry a lot.

Response from Dr. DeFoore

Hello Janet, and thanks for telling your story here. I can tell you're having a very hard time, and I will try to help.

First, I want you to consider that the reason you told your story here, and the reason you don't like how you've been acting is that you are better than that.

The person who wrote the above information knows that you don't want to be violent, hurt the people you love, and always have to be right. That does not match up with who you really are inside, and that's why it bothers you so much when you're that way.

Do the journaling process you will find on this page, which will help you to re-visit your past traumatic experiences. If you don't work on your past in this way, it will work on you. I know it's hard, but if you do it, you will feel better.

Also, begin a daily anger journal, following the guidelines on this page. This gives your anger a "place to go" where it does not hurt anyone.


Also, do these imagery processes for emotional healing, in order to address your emotional wounds from the past.

Learn to shift your perspective to a positive viewpoint by using the writing process described on this page. This is extremely important, so don't leave this one out!

The depression and crying may be related to some grief process you have not completed. Learn more about how to grieve and let go here.

You will also benefit from practicing these anger management techniques on a regular, ongoing basis.

You may find this page on relationships to be useful as well.

This entire web site is built to help good people like you, whose anger has taken control. Spend time on it, and take advantage of all the free information available to you. You can also sign up for our free Healing Anger newsletter, which will entitle you to a free Ebook on Anger Management Techniques.

Believe in yourself, Janet. Do these exercises for you--you are worthy of a good life.

My very best to you,

Dr. DeFoore

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