I Am Hurting Myself When I Have Uncontrolled Anger

by Pie
(Manila)

It all began when I was in my high school days. It happens that my mom goes through this menopausal thing and every day all she did was scold me and whine with almost anything.

Out of pent up anger, I went out and met my friend. Accidentally she happened to pinch my arm hard and it felt good to feel the pain because somehow it lessened the anger that welled up inside of me.

Starting that day forward when I get angry with someone I tend to hurt myself so I won't hurt anybody physically.

What will my actions be toward this kind of behavior? Is there a way to stop it?

Response from Dr. DeFoore

Hello Pie, and thanks for telling your story here. I'm glad you want to stop hurting yourself when you're angry. I will try to help.

I suggest you practice the three journaling processes on this page, which will help you review past trauma, express your anger in a healthy way, and begin shifting your focus to the good in yourself and your life.

It may also help you to do the physical release anger exercises described in this CD/audio program, which is also available as an Ebook. Since the pain you're causing yourself is physical, it may take a healthy physical action to break the cycle you are in.

You may be addicted to the pain, Pie. I suggest that you discipline yourself to abstain from hurting yourself one day at a time, just as an alcoholic would abstain from using alcohol--and follow my recommendations, and I think you will get some good results.

You are a good person. Please stop hurting yourself. You can find relief and release in other, healthier ways.

My very best to you,

Dr. DeFoore

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