Depression Hurts
You And The Ones You Love

You already know that depression hurts you. What you may not realize is how it hurts the ones you love.

We're going to take a unique look at depression here, and how you got depressed. Then we're going to look at how it affects others.

The good news you will discover here is that you have more control than you thought you did. You have the freedom to choose--and choose again, and again.

How Did You Get Depressed?

• Things happened that caused you pain, sorrow and fear.


• Whether you know it or not, you got angry. But you either didn't express your anger at all, or when you did it got punished or ignored.


• So you kept all of this inside, sort of giving up on your emotions. And things kept happening that hurt, scared and angered you, but you continued to keep it inside.


• Your depression began when you realized that you were going to be hurt over and over, and there is nothing you can do about it. Depression hurts, from this perspective, because it's a kind of despair.


• Depression can be seen as impacted emotions, compressed, toxic and not being released--just building and building.

This is all totally normal. The reason that depression hurts so many people these days is that being mildly to extremely depressed has become normal--meaning most people are feeling that way. But you don't have to be one of them!

As you can see from the above description of how you got depressed, this can happen to anyone, regardless of what kind of situation you come from.

How Does Depression Hurt Your Loved Ones?

If someone loves you, they want to see you happy. So, clearly, with this in mind, your loved ones don't want to see you depressed.

Beyond that, here are some other ways depressions hurts your loved ones:

• You won't express as much love or joy, and they'll miss that.


• You won't want to do things with them, so you'll be less of a companion to them.


• They will see you as fragile or broken, and they will protect you from their own thoughts and feelings--you can see how depression can cause communication to shut down.


• They might try to help you, but it won't work, because only you can help yourself. So they will feel angry and helpless when they see you depressed.


• They will worry about you, and if their pain gets strong enough, they will have to stay away from you for their own well being.

Pretty easy to see how this works, isn't it? I know, if you're depressed, this isn't going to make you feel better. It will probably make you even more depressed.

So why am I telling you? Because there is a certain narcissism in depression, and if you're totally focused on yourself, you may need to remember and focus on what is going on around you.

What Can You Do About It?

I'm glad you asked! First, consider getting some counseling, which has been found to be more effective than medication for long term healing of depression in some cases.

Also, take a look at these resources for understanding and treating depression:

• Learn about healing anger and depression together, which can be much more effective than just working on one at at time.


• Take a look at the various treatements for depression, and consider which one best suits you and your situation.


• If you're not sure whether you or someone close to you is actually depressed, use this depression test, these depression warning signs and these signs of depression to find out for sure.


• If nothing else, tell your story on this web site. Writing has been found to have therapeutic value, all by itself--free, and no side effects! Heal your depression and become your own best anger management resource.

That about wraps it up for now. Depression hurts, but it doesn't have to destroy you. Use the above referenced resources, and you will definitely start feeling better.

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