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Now Available! Dr. DeFoore's New Book GOODFINDING

A Teenager Gains Control Over Her Anger Blackouts

by Anonymous
(California)



I'm 16 and a girl. Ever since I was 13-14 yrs old I can get out of control with my temper, to the point of blacking out.
There are periods of my life where I don't remember anything at all. As time went by, I learned to control my "blackout anger."
It's slow but I'm getting there.

So to all those people out there who have blackout anger, here are a few tips that have worked for me:

1. Breathe. Take long, deep breaths.
2. Count up to ten real slowly.
3. Get a punching bag, if that helps.
4. Listen to music--it helped me!

So don't give up, it takes time. Never give up!

Once in a while I still blackout. It's more than likely that I'll have them the rest of my life, but if I know the signs when I'm going to blackout, I can just stop and get back in control.

Of course I'll have setbacks. As I wrote before, it takes time.



Response from Dr. DeFoore

Hello, and thanks for telling your story here. I really appreciate you sharing your experience, and offering tips on what has worked for you. I'm also glad you've had some success in managing your anger and preventing the blackouts.

I will suggest a couple of other techniques to supplement what you're suggesting. Blackouts are very serious, for several reasons:

1) A blackout actually means you temporarily lose conscious awareness of your actions, and that is potentially dangerous for anyone.

2) Blackouts are not a permanent condition, but if they get worse over time, they could lead to life-threatening situations.

3) During a blackout, you don't have the benefit of your normal good judgment and decision making abilities, which means you could do things that you will later regret. During one of these episodes, you are in danger of committing serious acts of violence that could radically change your life or the life of someone else.

It is important that you (and others reading this) understand that blackouts are not something to just accept and live with. There are solutions, and when these solutions are implemented, the blacking out will pass over time.

I strongly suggest you add the techniques on this page to the list you suggested above. This will go into more depth, and take you to the deeper cause of the anger causing the blackouts.

I hope this helps. Meanwhile, keep up the good work, and like you say...never give up!

My very best to you,

Dr. DeFoore

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