The Healing Anger Newsletter (skip to where the new issue starts) brings you a refreshing, helpful and upbeat approach to anger management and how it can work for you in every aspect of your life. Here is your chance to keep up with my (Dr. DeFoore here) latest discoveries and insights on anger management and how you can heal the anger in yourself, your family, your school and your workplace. If you like this ezine, please do a friend and me a big favor and "pay it forward" by forwarding it to them. If a friend did forward this to you and if you like what you read, please subscribe by visiting the Healing Anger Newsletter subscription page. This newsletter and the web site, AngerManagementResource.com were built and are maintained through a program called SiteBuildIt!, which is now offered as an eLearning course you can take from home! It's the best way I know of to deal with the economic stress that so many are facing right now. Find out how you can start your own successful Internet business by watching these great videos about why so many people love SiteBuildIt! Would you like to lend a helping hand? If you have purchased a book, CD or audio download, I would very much like to hear what you thought of your product! With your permission, I will publish your comments, with your name, on my web site to help other visitors like yourself learn more about the products. This would be a big help! Oh! By the way, did you get your free E-book? If so, after you've had a chance to read it and try some of the Anger Management Techniques, write to me and let me know what you think! March 1, 2010 Healing Anger Newsletter, Issue #022 How To Overcome Jealousy: And Learn To Trust Contents of this newsletter What's New on AngerManagementResource.com? What Is Jealousy? How To Overcome Jealousy How Do You Really Trust Someone? Sacred Roles In Relationships

What's new on the web site? Four new web pages--check them out! How To Handle A Narcissist This web page will help you deal with the narcissist in your life--whether it's you or someone else. Adult Attention Deficit Disorder Learn what you can do to heal this problem without medication. Relationship Problems Caused By Anger Many relationship problems can be solved by learning and practicing some basic skills. Learn what they are! Dealing With Passive Aggressive Behavior Learn how to deal with this problem--whether it's you or someone else that is passive aggressive. What Is Jealousy? Jealousy comes from fear, and not enough self love. You get jealous because you're afraid your true love will leave you for someone else. You get jealous because you don't have enough good stuff going on inside you to let the other person do their thing. I know, that's really hard if it's your spouse and they're flirting or cheating on you. But that's the way it is. Here's what I want you to think about when it comes to jealousy: It all starts either because your partner is really unfaithful, or because you've never learned to trust anyone--or both. So, you think you've got some good reasons for your doubts and suspicions, and then your imagination takes over. This is dangerous territory. When you start imagining things that you're afraid of, you can literally drive yourself crazy with the possible scenarios you run through your mind. You just can't afford this. Your mental health is your most valuable resource, and you can't afford to mess with it. Suspicion and imaginary "movies you run in your head" will mess with your mind. Keep reading, so that you can learn some alternatives to this "crazy-making" stuff. Jealousy is just no fun for anybody, least of all you--the one that's jealous! So, do yourself a favor and keep reading so that you don't have to live with this. How To Overcome Jealousy The main thing you have to do is shift your focus from the other person to yourself. Remember the Eric Clapton song that goes, Before you accuse me, take a look at yourself. Use these relationship quotes and this page on overcoming jealousy to help you get yourself back on track. Here are some points to consider about jealousy: One way of looking at jealousy is that you're minding somebody else's business instead of your own. And yes, I mean even if you're married to them. Suspicion, anger and jealousy never solved any problems. They make things worse, not better. So, what you have to do is love yourself so much that you can say, "I'm this wonderful person, and if s/he is smart enough to figure that out, then s/he will get to stay with me. If not, it's their loss." Without self love, you will just ask too much of another person--and they'll never measure up. When you get your focus on yourself, and start to feel really good about who you are, your jealousy will subside. You'll realize that even if your partner is in fact cheating on you, that is something they will have to face and deal with on their own. How Do You Really Trust Someone? First of all, you have to realize you cannot trust anyone to "never hurt you" or "never leave you." Love is letting go, and if you hold on too tight, it's not love at all. You have to get really good at taking care of yourself, and start to trust yourself. So, here's how it goes with trust: It all starts with how you feel about yourself. When you feel really good about yourself, your thoughts regarding trust and jealousy are, "I trust this person to be exactly who they are. And I trust myself to handle whatever comes along in this relationship." When you don't feel safe in a relationship, and you don't feel you can trust yourself to take care of yourself with that person, that's when you have to start thinking about getting out. Even then, however, you really have to trust yourself, because that's who you'll be left with. And it really helps if you have a strong, positive spiritual faith, so that you're not only trusting in yourself but something bigger and more powerful than you. A strong sense of internal well being is essential to trust yourself or your significant other. If you don't have any kind of spiritual focus that helps with this, you might consider trying to develop one. Research has shown that people who have a strong, positive spiritual faith tend to do better in all aspects of life. Learn About Healthy Boundaries In Relationships This excellent CD program is entitled, Sacred Roles In Marriage: Keys To Creating Fantastic Relationships, and is available either in CD format or as an MP3 audio download. Learn these valuable tools for building healthy boundaries and loving relationships, or your money back! You have nothing to lose, and everything to gain. Consider the time, energy (and maybe money) you are investing here as an investment in yourself, that will serve you and everyone you love for the rest and the best of your life. P.S. Why not make the rest of your life the best of your life? You can get started right now with Elegant Aging: Growing Deeper, Stronger and Wiser. P.P.S. Did you know that I offer telephone counseling around the world? That's right, from the comfort of your home, you can get professional counseling from me, Dr. William DeFoore. Contact us now to schedule a session! Next Issue Dealing With Passive Aggressive Behavior Whether It's Yours Or Someone Else's

Let me hear from you! Comments? Ideas? Feedback? I'd love to hear from you. Just reply to this ezine and tell me what you think! If you have ideas for future Healing Anger Newsletter issues, I'm open to considering them. Here is your opportunity to get involved--I might even include your comments, story or link in a future issue of this ezine. Also, as I mentioned above I would very much like your testimonial or endorsement if you have purchased a product--or if you downloaded our free E-book! Don't forget! We want to hear your story, and when you submit it you get your own web page on the site! Take a look at the categories you can write in now. It's easy! Thanks for being here! William G. DeFoore